Harbaugh: Our Decision To Stop Using Analytics Was Based On Analytics
Baltimore, MA-Having been criticized for his frequent use of analytics to make game-time decisions, John Harbaugh finally got rid of...
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- Dec 17, 2021
Bishop Sycamore To Hire Urban Meyer
Columbus, OH-After a disastrous stint with the Jaguars, Urban Meyer has announced his return to football as head coach of Bishop...
- Dec 12, 2021
Frank Caliendo To Replace John Gruden As Raider's Head Coach
Las Vegas, NV-Hoping to replicate the motivational skills of John Gruden in the locker room, the Raiders announced they would be hiring...
- Dec 1, 2021
Madden To Allow Player To Click X To Kneel During Games
Redwood City, CA-Citing complaints from fans over failure to add new and exciting features, update Franchise mode, or fix bugs, EA...
- Dec 1, 2021
Desean Jackson Pleased To Be Going To Team With Rich History Of Bigotry
Las Vegas, NV-Citing a shared love of bigotry, racism, homophobia, and anti-semitism, DeSean Jackson signed with the Raiders Monday...
- Dec 1, 2021
Henry Ruggs Cleared Of All Charges After He's Found To Be Vaccinated
Las Vegas, NV- Henry Ruggs III who was charged with manslaughter after drunk driving at 150 MPH was cleared of all charges yesterday...
- Dec 1, 2021
Approximately 3 People Left On Earth Unaware Of Jeff Wilson's Status As Fantasy Sleeper Of The Year
NFL experts reported last night that of the estimated 7.6 Billion person population, 3 single individuals were not aware that Jeff Wilson...
- Dec 1, 2021
Justin Tucker Misses First Kick Ever
Baltimore, MD-Justin Tucker missed the first field goal of his career Thursday, setting his record back from 100% accuracy to 99.9. Of...
- Dec 1, 2021
Miami Dolphins To Be Released From Captivity After Latest Win
Miami,FL-After an Underdog win that no one was expecting against the Ravens, Dolphin's owner Stephen Ross announced he would free his...
- Nov 25, 2021
NFL Thanksgiving Games So Bad Man May Actually Talk To In-laws
Milwaukee, WI-Citing a horrible series of thanksgiving games, Ryan Michaels said contact with in-laws may be less limited this year....
- Nov 9, 2021
Mark Davis Has Yet To Let Hot Date Know About Al Davis Effigy Living In Back Room
Las Vegas, NV-As Mark Davis welcomed his latest hot date to his hotel room, there were quite a few things he didn't tell her. Among them...
- Nov 9, 2021
Najee Harris Reveals Claim That He Slept On Floors In College Was False, "I Never Slept At All"
Pittsburgh, PA-During the broadcast of the Steelers Bears games, the announcer told a false story about Najee Harris's college...
- Nov 7, 2021
Aaron Rodgers Attempts To "Immunize" Self From Interceptions
Below Aaron Rodgers can be seen before grumbling "Cancel Culture, Witch Hunt, Woke Mob!" at unsuspecting fans Greenbay, WI-Citing health...
- Oct 31, 2021
Report: Tom Brady Breaks Another Fucking Record
Tampa Bay, FL- Breaking News: Sources report asshole Tom Brady breaks another fucking record. No, we don't know what it is, and yes we...
- Oct 31, 2021
Patriots Just Relieved To Be Center Of Cheating Story That Has Nothing To Do With Football
Foxborough, MA -After Steph Curry's Father Dell Curry alleged his ex-wife had an affair with a former patriots player, the Patriots once...
- Oct 30, 2021
Warren Buffet On Ndamukong Suh's Friendship: You Try Saying No To 6'3, 300 Pound Violent D-Lineman
Below, Warren Buffet attempts to spell help in blinking Morse Code Omaha, NE-When asked about his longstanding friendship with NFL player...
- Oct 30, 2021
Report: Only Scary Part Of Halloween Is That Local Man Gets Texans and Lions game
Jacksonville, FL-As local 32-year-old man James McShaner reflected on Halloween he came to a frightening conclusion. He had outgrown the...
- Oct 28, 2021
Troy Aikman: I Have Held A Bottle While Someone Else Peed In It
Below, the pink eye Troy Aikman mysteriously contracted this weekend LA, CA-After Joe Bucks' brave and controversial statement that he...
- Oct 28, 2021
Randy Moss On Joe Buck's Admission He Peed In A Bottle On Air: "That Is A Disgusting Act"
Charlotte, NC-After news broke that Joe Buck was once forced to pee in a bottle during a broadcast after he was unable to take a break,...
- Oct 25, 2021
Entire World Shocked To Hear Richard Sherman Involved In A Domestic Altercation
Redmond, WA-The entire world let out a collective gasp Monday upon hearing the news that Nobel prize-winning cornerback Richard Sherman...
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