Target To Expand Black Friday To Two Day Period, Introduce Black Thursday
New York City, NY-Citing the Holiday's popularity, Target announced it would be expanding Black Friday to a two-day holiday, starting on...
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- Oct 31, 2021
Report: Tom Brady Breaks Another Fucking Record
Tampa Bay, FL- Breaking News: Sources report asshole Tom Brady breaks another fucking record. No, we don't know what it is, and yes we...
- Sep 22, 2021
New Deshaun Watson Release Program Allows Him To Serve Time, Take Furlough For Practice, Games.
Houston, Texas- A new prison policy for the rich and famous is in its inaugural stage this week. The prison policy will first be tried...
- Sep 7, 2021
Carson Wentz Out 8 Weeks With Chip In Shoulder
Above is the X Ray of his horrible injury Indianapolis, IN- After miraculously recovering from being shattered into glass a month ago,...
- Sep 7, 2021
Waffle House Job Interviews To Require Interviewees To Win A Fist Fight Against Interviewers
Atlanta, GA-With Waffle House seeing a 321% rise in Waffle-related violence, and shakily recorded fight videos, Waffle House has been...
- Jul 30, 2021
Source of discontent between Giants, Kelvin Benjamin, result of Joe Judge eating the last donut
The Donut In question that sparked the argument among the coach and player.
- Jul 30, 2021
Carson Wentz shatters into 53 separate pieces after latest injury
Pictured is the 51 recovered pieces of Carson Wentz After the Colts Starting Quarterback Carson Wentz took a tough hit during practice,...
- Jul 30, 2021
Report: Zach Wilson looks like a composite of all the kids that bullied you in High School
New York, NY- Reports are circulating that Zach Wilson looks like every kid that bullied you in high school. That's right, Zach Wilson...
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