Report: Every NFL Coach Personally Hates Your Fantasy Football Team

Below, Urban Meyer celebrates as his benching of James Robinson eliminates you from the playoffs.

Reports circulating from the NFL prove that all 32 NFL Head Coaches have based their personal decisions, game plans, and transaction in order to ruin your fantasy season. "My decision to play Carlos Hyde over James Robinson was entirely based on your 2021 Fantasy Football Draft selection," Said Coach Urban Meyer. Urban was not alone in his decision making, as Coach Mike Zimmerman made special note of your lineup. "I decided to hold back Dalvin Cook from playing not due to the severity of the injury but due to the necessity of him to your fantasy team", said Zimmerman. "Many called my move to trade Von Miller boneheaded. Little did they realize it was all a part of my ploy to weaken the Broncos D/ST and ensure you got last place," Said Coach Vic Fangio. At press time, NFL Player Cam Akers had announced he tore his ACL to purposely derail your team, and suffered the injury when he did knowing the fantasy football draft had already occurred.