NFL to replace Pro Bowl With NFC-AFC Bar Fight

Las Vegas, NV- Seeking to balance player safety with fans' need for entertainment, the NFL announced all future pro bowls would be postponed and replaced with a bar fight. "One of the ideas behind the pro bowl is to give fans the opportunity to see what players are like when they're not on the field, preparing for football and in an NFL mindset. What better place to express this than a bar fight?", said Commissioner Rodger Goodell. The victor of the barfight would be determined based on medical analysis of which team suffered the most bruises, cuts, and concussions after the 60 minute period was over. "Please tell me I'm not the only one who wants to see Suh and Donald Vs. Watt and Bosa?' said NFL analyst Skip Bayless, who was giddy with joy at the announcement. The NFL emphasized that although getting drunk during the fight was acceptable, driving was not as well as having sex afterward unless it takes place in one of the bathroom stalls. At press time, the NFL cited Kamara's criminal costs as a result of misinterpreting the first AFC NFC bar fight to be in 2022 rather than 2023