Man Reassures Wife Winning Fantasy Championship Was Third Happiest Day In His Life

Salem, OR-Nathan Farmer reassured his wife Monday night that when he said last Wednesday "This is the happiest day of his life" after winning his fantasy football league, he was merely using a figure of speech. "Honey. You know our marriage, and the birth of our children is far more important than any fantasy football game, even if the odds were stacked against me from the beginning, with my top 2 running backs being injured. I'm glad we're married because I've been with you for 15 years and ill continue to be with you for the rest of my life, even if the fantasy league has been in my life longer. Nothing could replace your beautiful smile, except maybe a competent tight end. Nothing could replace your laughs except maybe a waiver wire steal. Just know that this union is unbreakable and that you are undroppable". Finished Farmer much to his wife's displeasure . At press time, Farmer was seen calling his lawyer to make sure his wife couldn't take half the fantasy team in a possible divorce.